When I was diagnosed with cancer, I had an honest conversation with myself for the first time...ever. Because I wanted something, I decided to pray. I prayed that I would live to see beyond the end of my nose and experience joy. (Little did I realize, all I had to do is give myself permission to live and it would be instantaneously available!) At the time, I hoped I was talking to the Creator, so I asked for a vision, just to be sure.

I needed to see something that was capable of shattering the dogma that drove my life to the point of extinction. As though it happened yesterday, I remember asking to see something that would redefine the nature of my life.

Seeing the person in the tree did just that.

If you need a little bit of help seeing the content of my vision, click the link. Please take a moment to contemplate the image and let the entirety of the image reveal itself to you. I'll post my thoughts in a few days.

 

It has always been my dream to transcend the mundane aspects of life and see miracles in my everyday existence. Thanks to Liza, I did. Standing in that cave and taking that picture has forever changed my life.

There is nothing extrordinary about the composition, lighting or subject of the picture in the previous post. So what's the big deal about a bunch of rocks, trees, sky and landscape?

Nothing.

That's what made this day of discovery so profound.

In an ordinary desert landscape my dreams were literally transformed into a living physical reality. I'll let you look a bit longer before I show you the secret.

I'll illuminate my vision in the next post.

I used to spend a lot of time worryoing about the future. Getting into the right schools to get the proper education was all that I lived for. Upon graduation, I would not just get a job, but embark on a career path that was a reflection of all my hard work. I would continue to be forward thinking and become tenured, go back to school, receive awards and accolaids and develop innovative programs. All of this work would allow me to buy a house, invest, lease a luxury car, dine in fine restaurants and be like everyone else.

Miserable.

When I found myself staring into the realization that I am who I am, always, I started looking backwards. What could I have done differently, where did I mess up, what did I do wrong?

It's amazing how much time I spent looking to the future and into the past. As I reflect on those years, I no longer wonder why I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm surprised that it didn't happen earlier.

Life was nothing less than a constant crisis mired in second guessing and anticipating consequences. It's a sad reality that I would allow myself to begin living my dreams when I retired at 62. That means that I would begin living my life on my terms in 37 years. After eating shit for nearly four decades, I would permit happiness to enter into my life. That's after the 2.5 decades I spent in school numbing my mind enough to live 2/3 of my existence in misery. Isn't it ironic that I used to write referrals for people to see psychologists because they were unhappy in life?

One day, I met Liza.

When my whole plan of misery and drudgery vaporized, I met Liza in Sedona, AZ. By that time, I had quite a large photography portfolio and was spending a great deal of time with the Havasupai. Whe she heard my story of renewal and saw the pictures that recorded my journey of discovery in nature, she wanted to take my to a place that she was sure would yield some new images.

Standing in the cave above the Seven Sacred Pools thrust me into the joy of living in the moment. Never before had I experienced such a state of bliss. When I looked out from the mouth of the cave and across the horizon, the vision of life transcended anything I had ever known to exist.

Can you see it?

It has been nearly three years since I was introduced to the domain of message boards. The world of electronic culture that pulses through internet forums inspired a surge of creative expression that transformed my life. My journey of healing after cancer was available for the entire world to see and read. The photoart that chronicled my life in the Grand Canyon touched every continent. I shared stories, critiqued photography, made friends and got swept away in the timeless expanse of the e-world.

Then, like everything I pursue with reckless abandon, I tired of it. Chatting was a bore. Posting became meaningless. The portal of discovery that opened a new world to me closed. While deleting many of my old haunts from my list of favorites, I decided to visit one of them just one last time before I erased it. PHPBB would be exorcised from my life. I was readying myself for a new journey of discovery.

Enticed by the seductive power of a creative blend that teased my imagination, I clicked the link…

A new revolution was now underway.

Like my childhood friends who lured me into my first B-B gun war, I followed LB to Hitherston Forums.

Sorry, I was going to bait you with ice cream but I've done that to so many people now they don't believe me. Oh wait NO, yes free cameras....

*Rigs up more traps if this one doesn't work*

I was hooked.

The witty enticement offered by LB in a flurry of IM’s had me hooked. The red herring of liberation yielded to a renewed creativity that was being seeded and nurtured by Hitherston.com. As a co-creator of Hitherston, LB’s endearing wit and charm is an invitation to a space that nurtures artisans and encourages friendly competition. If you happen to venture into the domain of Hitherston.com, and find something in your message box, consider yourself lucky, LB is probably working her magic!

After posting on Hitherston Forums for a few days, I crossed into another realm I vowed to never enter…AIM. Having purged myself of instant messaging several years earlier, I benefited from more consistent sleep patterns and face-to-face relationships. Like a chronic gambler able to face his addiction, I was living a life in the real world, free of the seductive powers of instant messaging. Until I met Molly, I never realized what I was missing.

Not only did Molly shatter my illusions about the value of instant messaging, she guided me through the world of Hitherston and introduced me to a community of people that are enthusiastic about self-expression. Molly’s passion for people and art creates a warm environment where the most seasoned writers and casual photographers can share their work and receive encouraging feedback. As a seasoned artist and co-leader of Hitherston, Molly makes everyone feel at home. Be sure to strike up a conversation with Molly the next time you visit Hitherston, you’ll be glad you did.

I’ve had thousands of unremarkable chats and met hundreds of people who have quickly passed from memory. ChasingLife87 was one of the people who transcended anonymity and made a lasting impression that I carry with me today. As a writer, she is passionate and witty. As a graphic artist, her never-ending love of learning is intoxicating. As a programmer, her dedication is unmatched. Meeting such a multi-dimensional artisan was one of the highlights of the message boards I used to frequent. Unfortunately, as my interest in online forums waned, I lost contact with ChasingLife87.

After spending several weeks on Hitherston Forums, there was one co-creator I had yet to meet. After reading her work and seeing her influence on Hitherston, I wanted to find out who the enigmatic Meli was. Thanks to Molly, I was finally able to meet her on AIM. Meli introduced herself as the person who "kept bugging me to show her stuff" on another message board. Unable to recall sharing any of my skills with anyone that bugged me, I was amazed to find out Meli's identity. She is ChasingLife87!

If you were fortunate enough to stumble upon this article, and have yet to explore the world of Hitherston, take the time to explore a place where art and community create lasting friendships. Start a journal, post a poem, share your photography and maybe a favorite tutorial with the Hitherston community and immerse yourself in a world united by the motto Unitas Contentione.

I'm back!  Working as a school photographer has offered me quite a bit of material that I'll be including over the coming weeks.  I thought teaching for 12 years was adequate preparation for life behind the lens...hahahahahaha!  Right!  Get ready for the first installment tomorrow.  Let's see...something about the three most memorable moments of the fall season.  Here's a sneak peek to tantalize your curiosity.  Peeing, vomiting and sleeping are three ways to ensure a legacy!

After spending the majority of the last year working on this website, an unexpected opportunity has materialized as a result of this project.  I recently began working with a portrait photographer in order to further broaden my professional experience base. 

As this new job consumes an average of 10 waking hours per day, I have been unable to devote the time required to maintain daily entries in illumineering.com discussion.  Over the coming days I hope to do more than eat and sleep after work!  Once I have adjusted to this new work schedule, I fully expect to actively update illumineering.com discussion.  For now, dreamtime is calling...

Be sure to look at the Fun Photo Manipulation before you look at the source image.  What do you think is included in the original?  Take a few minutes to closely examine the image before you click the link.

Was it anything like you thought it would be?

I'll be posting these before/after photomanipulations periodically.  Be sure to visit illumineering discussion frequently to test your identification skills!

Can you guess what the original image used to create this kaleidoscope is?  I'll post it tomorrow.